Gerard James Humes

Gerard James “Jerry” Humes died on July 31, 2026 after complications from frontotemporal dementia. He passed peacefully at his home in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.

Jerry was born on March 10, 1948 in Islip, New York, to Gerard and Theresa Humes. His time as an only child was brief and he took on the role of big brother with the arrival of sisters Karen and Doreen.

Jerry’s Italian mother taught him how to cook and his Italian/French-Canadian father passed down an unflappable work ethic. As one story goes, his dad gave him a Lincoln… but not before dismantling the engine. Jerry was told, “If you can put it together, you can drive it.”

Through high school, Jerry was a creative soul. He was a talented artist, writer and even tried his hand at theater (behind the scenes and on-stage).

Jerry joined the United States Navy after high school and served several years as a Machinist’s Mate, assigned to the USS John Paul Jones. After the Navy, he married his childhood sweetheart and the first love of his life, Kathleen Cross, and together they raised three children while living in New Jersey and Long Island.

Jerry spent his early career working in industrial leak sealing, repairing active steam lines at chemical refineries, power plants and nuclear facilities. It was dirty, dangerous work, but he found it exciting.

In 1980, a job transfer sent Jerry and his young family from New York to Virginia Beach, Virginia. He traded his hard hat for a keyboard and became a leader of the company’s growing computer department. It marked the start of his lifelong romance with technology and computer programming.

In 1988, his wife Kathleen passed away after a long battle with cancer. It was a sad, devastating time and the kind of family tragedy that left a clear line, separating everything before and everything after.

But life did go on. And once Jerry made it through the darkness, he was lucky enough to find light and new love.

Pamela Brown was the second love of his life. What started as a whirlwind romance settled into a comfortable groove that lasted for decades. Jerry and Pamela married in 1993. After living in Charlotte, Baton Rouge, and Richmond, the couple settled in Winston-Salem, North Carolina in 2008.

Jerry worked as a programmer for banks and financial companies before retiring around 2022. But even after writing his last lines of code, he wasn’t ready to sit still yet.

Even though he was a private homebody at heart, Jerry was most in his element around people. He was a charming, funny guy in the office or at the corner pub. That social connection was important and he kept it alive working his “fun job” as a shuttle driver for a local car dealership.

In the short window after full retirement and before his FTD diagnosis, Jerry embraced the slow life. He enjoyed glasses of red wine in his recliner, paired with anything on PBS. He loved taking summer trips to Emerald Isle where he’d stroll the beach collecting seashells and sit facing the sea, waiting for the pelican fly-bys.

At home, he’d spend as many days outdoors as he could: chopping wood, taking care of the yard, working on the small bridge over his backyard creek, and always keeping one eye out for local wildlife.

Jerry was loved and will be missed. Even after he lost his memories and his words, there were moments of clarity that gave his family peace. A quick laugh at a bad joke. A full sentence delivered without pause. Clear signs that he was still there.

Jerry is survived by his wife Pamela Jane Humes, his children Peter (Liz) Humes, Christopher (Melodie Franklin) Humes and Kelly (Royal) Robinson. Stepchildren Alicia (Luis Mendez) Brown and Ian Brown. Eight grandchildren: Woody (Hannah) Humes, Lola Humes, Elias, Olive & Leyla Humes, Ravi, Allim & Benin Robinson, and two step-grandchildren: Sophie Skrobiszewski and Paulo Mendez. Two great granddaughters, Ellie & Gia Humes and one step-great grandson, Oliver Dickson.

He is also survived by his sister Doreen (James) McDaniel and niece Guisele McDaniel.

Jerry was preceded in death by wife Kathleen, parents Gerard and Theresa Humes, sister Karen, and granddaughter Milla Robinson.

A memorial service for family and friends will be held in Virginia later this year. Date and location are still to be determined.

Please feel free to share any memories, photos, or condolences here on the guestbook.

In lieu of flowers, Jerry’s advice would probably be to do whatever you want to do. Support your local PBS and NPR station. Donate to a brain charity. Go climb, hug, or plant a tree. It’s your life, live it the way you want.

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